Thursday, April 15, 2010

Fandom in Peril

When I heard about the exclusive early screening of the Glee spring premiere at The Grove, a singular thought came to my mind. “I’m frickin’ going.”

Certain individuals have suggested that my love for entertainment and pop culture is the reason I’m currently single, which is a difficult idea to face. My passion for compelling characters and brilliant storytelling is deep and mighty. I’ve been this way since I can remember, cycling through various television and music obsessions over the years. Everything from Scarecrow & Mrs. King to Barry Manilow to The X-Files.

Simply put, I’m a fan.

Take Glee, for instance. I don’t just watch the show. I rewatch it. I post my favorite quotes on Twitter. I discuss the show with Facebook friends who are also fans. I listen to the songs on my iPod. I do these things because I enjoy the show immensely, so I find a way to continue drawing joy from it in between episodes.

A close friend recently said to me, “I can’t wait until you no longer act like a fan, because that will always keep you separate from the things you want in life.” I can’t stop thinking about that one. It’s hard not to feel like my life is now at a crossroads, where I must choose between my lifestyle of fancy and the future reality I long for – a creative career, marriage, and motherhood. Why stay in a fantasy when I can just make it happen, right?

So here I am, holding Will Schuester and Doctor Who close to my heart, knowing I need to release them to make room for new prospects, but not wanting to let go. Not yet. But soon, I fear. Soon.


  1. Being a fan is a GOOD thing - I can't tell you how being a fan has EXPANDED my circle of friends. And good story-telling? Pop-culture? You know Shakespeare was accused of the same sins... Keep fighting the good fight... and Glee???? Well GLEEEEE!!!

  2. Thanks for your comment! Being a fan has given me a lot of joy, but maybe it's time to grow up and calm down. And no matter what, I'll keep watching Glee - it just keeps getting better! :)

  3. Amy Pond: "I grew up."

    The Doctor: "Don't worry...I'll soon fix that."

    You best never give this up because if you do, in the words of Tony from Panco, "I will fight you."

    Stashwick out

  4. I absolutely DISAGREE with that advice. To deny so much of what you love and have loved for so long is to deny yourself. It is part of who you are, it is part of your voice. It will be loved by your future partner, it will be loved by your future children and we love you now for it! I am a wife and a mother who writes about fairies every chance I get. I read Dune, I watch the Doctor and swoon over the Supernatural boys. Never compromise yourself my dear! We love you just as you are.

    Charity Stashwick

  5. Ah, Tony from Panco. Those were the days...being a Panco person... :)

    Thanks for your kind words, Stashwicks. Perhaps I should clarify - it's less that I'm giving it up entirely but more that I'm realizing I need to dissolve my fangirl demeanor in order to create more opportunities in my career and life. It's a good thing, really.

    Phew, still don't believe myself, but I'm trying...

  6. I think that is terrible advice too.

    If you're looking for a relationship, I'll tell you what my friend did: she sought out Craig's List. She posted a list of desirable traits for a boyfriend. She told me that she got many replies back, but only one was of great interest to her. That was about five months ago and she's now in a happy relationship. The guy is a geek like her and a sweetheart to boot.

    And honestly, denying who you are will only bring you more heartache. It's strongly NOT recommended. Being a fan has become chic and people see that.

  7. Writerfangirl - thank you so much for your kind words. I'm trying not to think of it as denying who I am - I hate thinking about not being true to myself - but I do see the opportunity to bridge the gap and have both worlds.