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Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Requiem for a Heavyweight Thinker

The Block is stubbornly large and grows exponentially under the weight of my stare. I’ve been instructed by others to avoid its time-consuming allure. The Block is showing me that I’m on the wrong road. Heed its message. Best to find a new direction entirely.

But I am equally stubborn in my journey. A Taurus through and through. There must be a way around. Perhaps I can go over it. Or through it. I fight and fight, drawing on all of the problem-solving powers of my engineering school days. I always believe a solution exists. I just need to be smart enough and determined enough to find it.

Because fighting is something I know how to do. I’ve fought my entire life. For leadership offices, for job promotions, for every single A+ I’ve ever gotten. Fighting has always worked for me. It’s reliable, dependable, and comfortable.

But fighting has no place in the creative world. The actions of this world are relaxation, allowance, permission, and freedom. Living here means letting go. My boxing gloves are completely ineffective when I swing. Instead of beating a solution into view, my blows merely land on my own face, a helpless exercise of futility.

So I must retire the fight. Surrender. Let the Block win and find a different way to travel. The unknown is scary, but maybe it holds the solution I’m seeking.

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